I need to come up with some plans for New Year’s Eve. Traditionally this holiday was spent watching movies, eating snacks, and staying up as late as possible. This sounds cool until I look back and realize most New Year’s Eves I have had were very disappointing. Never once did Jay-Z show up and invite me to some rooftop party. When will my life be a movie?
Last year I spent New Year’s Eve at my dad’s place. My new apartment had its power shut off because I didn’t bother moving in there until really late in the month despite having ownership since the beginning of December. So at one point I was in possession of two apartments, which sounds pretty cool–the same way I would brag about my dad having two jobs and two girlfriends (not including my mom) when I was younger. Less is not more. Less is just better and not as damaging to a child’s psyche.
In years previous to that alcohol was involved or I abstained from alcohol because I didn’t feel like starting the New Year chewing on my blankets wishing I was dead from a hangover. The worst were the years my sister and I would have parties and none of my friends I told everyone I had would show up. I would usually retreat to my bedroom and watch King of the Hill. At least Bill Dauterive was more pathetic.
I spent one New Year’s at a friend’s house and I’m not even sure why I was friends with him. I think it was because I needed something to do on New Year’s Eve so I planned it out five years in advance and earned his trust. We didn’t do much and I remember hiding from old high school classmates buying ice cream in the only open place in the town, a 24-hour drug store. I don’t think anything should be open on New Year’s Eve. That’s not fair. People should be allowed to celebrate or have the chance to kill themselves in private.
When I was really young I would engage in the earlier mentioned snacking and movie watching. This was pretty much what I did every weekend anyway. For some reason the only movie I remember watching on New Year’s Eve was Ghosts of Mars. I also remember eating mozzarella sticks while watching it because nothing makes a bad John Carpenter movie better than fried cheese. Hell, nothing is better than fried cheese.
This year I have no current plans on what to do. I certainly don’t want to go to Times Square because that’s just asking to stand in the cold alone with high hopes only to be upset with the results. I also can’t stay at home because I don’t have a television. How will I know when the ball has dropped??? Do I need to buy a watch? Take everyone’s word for it?
What will most likely happen is I’ll have a movie marathon at home and eat popcorn because I have been craving popcorn ever since I saw it at the grocery store. Does ever happen to you? Do you ever see food at the grocery store and then remember it exists?
Best of luck to you all in 2014. Except for you. You can die.