Posts Tagged ‘women jokes’

Back in the 1950s there was this thing called Communism. Americans were terribly afraid of it because they were told to be. During this time a man named Joseph McCarthy was out calling anyone whose face he didn’t like a Communist. In those days being accused a Communist was the worst thing you could call a person. Then things like Civil Rights, Women’s Liberation, and general respect toward Circus Freaks happened. These things were necessary but a funny thing happened. Now that everyone was on an equal playing field and the Communists weren’t so evil anymore we ran out of bad guys. Imagine Batman without bad guys. Most likely he’d turn on those closest to him.

Alfred_batman_tas

(Take away bad guys in the world and you take away this old cartoon man’s life)

These days the worst things you can call a person are a racist, a sexist, a homophobe, or a Republican which I am told are all racists, sexists, and homophobes anyway. Really? You think Ronald Reagan kept Nancy around just so he could beat her and insult her? Sounds pretty retarded to me. Of course, retarded is a word we’re not allowed to say because it offends people who know retarded people. So if you do the math properly I should get offended every time someone uses the word pussy because God knows I know a lot of them.

I don’t really get called a racist or sexist ever more than in joking. I get away with it because I don’t associate with people who go around tossing those accusations like they have the highest morals on the planet. I’m not racist. I know I’m not. I don’t even have to defend it for any reason at all. I could. I could say I’ve had friends of all different races. That still proves nothing. I’m also not a sexist. Sure, women piss me off a ton. I still would never treat one poorly just because her gender. Unless she was into that kind of thing which actually makes me like a girl more.

submissive-women

(I don’t know a thing about this woman but I want to marry her)

When you call someone a racist you’re making a huge stance. You’re saying that person is basically Hitler without a following. And people who follow you on Twitter don’t count as an army. Unless they retweet everything you say. I’ll count it then. I have met racists though and I know the difference between someone simply making a joke and being a full-blown racist. Someone making a joke will comment on race. It doesn’t matter if it’s in poor taste or not, if it has any semblance of a joke it probably was meant to be. Most people aren’t funny, keep that in mind. A full-blown racist would be someone who for no reason other than to add an extra noun into their vocabulary tosses out the N-Word and seems to have speeches stuck in their head how much they despise a certain race. If you can’t tell the difference between the two you probably shouldn’t be calling people names anyway.

What I believe has happened is people have gone completely soft when it comes to what can and cannot be joked about. Anything funny needs a victim. That’s not me saying it, that’s scientific fact. Any funny joke you ever come across will have a victim to it. The joke doesn’t have to be harsh or cruel, but there must be a victim. There must be someone who is made to look stupid, ignorant, or end up harmed. The problem is people have such a poor sense of humor these days and they are such wimps they never allow themselves to be a victim. I don’t find this prideful or tough. I think not allowing yourself to be the victim for humor makes you stubborn and boring. Boring of course to me is the worst thing you can call a person.

I’m not sure where everything went wrong. I didn’t pay attention much in history class because all my teachers were women and what do they know about history? See, I’m clearly joking. No high school would hire ALL female history teachers. Girls just don’t know anything about our past and that’s why men make better history teachers. Again, I’m joking. Are you offended? I hope not.

girls-shopping

(“We know lots about history. Hitler was bad and the polka dot was invented in 1957.” – all women everywhere)

Really what I wanted to say here was if at any point you think “that shouldn’t be joked about” then you’re probably wrong. If it offends you, don’t go out of your way to make it a problem. Why give yourself that stress? Why get offended by anything that isn’t a direct and cruel attack on you or someone you care about? Not even something. Individuals are much more important than any belief system. I would hope anyone reading this would defend a person no matter who they are over a belief any day.

Stop being babies. Stop trying to censor the world. Grow up. If someone makes a joke that offends you, make a joke back at them. Some people didn’t want Mitt Romney for president because he seemed too mean and aggressive which is the exact reason why you should want someone to be president. “Mr. Gorbachev please if you wouldn’t mind can you consider tearing down that wall?” doesn’t have the same gusto as the real quote.

America, get your hard-on back.