I have always had this fantasy of rescuing someone. I used to think when I started driving I’d constantly see cars on fire swerve off the road and into a telephone pole. I’d pull over and race out to save the driver. Maybe I’d get lucky and it was a sorority road trip gone awry. These coeds would owe their lives to me. I would be their everything. And as I grow older this fantasy remains. I was to be a knight in shining armor. I want to be a motherfucking hero.
(I’m right here Cuba and strangely edited Ray Liotta face!)
It doesn’t matter in what way I am doing the rescuing, so long as it’s obvious and clear that I’m the one saving the day. I think that’s why I love Taxi Driver so much. I would so love to be able to shoot up a brothel to save a young prostitute. The same goes for the movie Sin City. Bruce Willis saves little Jessica Alba from a yellow thing and she grows up to be Jessica Alba and wants to thank him. Really the “thanking” portion is just extra and I could deal without it. What I really like about the idea of rescuing someone is that with each breath they take they remember they would be nothing without you.
Of course I am more than likely not going to end up in some dangerous situation where I have to buy guns and kill some gangsters to save someone. That’s just not how my life works. Maybe you live wild and have those opportunities, but not me. My rescuing happens more with people in immediate lesser danger, usually to themselves. I have always been interested in helping out anyone with some sort of mental trouble whether it be depression or the other bugs that aren’t much different. And before you go off saying “no they’re all very different” shut your face. If they debilitate and change a person I don’t see the difference.
The problem with wanting to save others is you must have your shit together. I don’t even mean you have to appear to have it together, you actually have to which is different from everything else in life. Most things you do in life you can get away with being clueless. When it comes to rescuing someone else is you need to know what you’re doing. For instance I could never be a fireman. I would have no clue where to start. My first question would be “What’s the axe for? Wait, chopping down doors right? Do you ever chop them down? Seems like you wouldn’t have to do that all too much.”
(I have too much to say about this picture and the man in it. I’ll write something up for Kidz Showz on it at some point)
I’m impressed by people’s whose lives are about rescuing. I just want it as a hobby because I would feel silly collecting baseball cards again. And I don’t have my shit together so I can’t fully save anyone. I feel it’s important in order to function properly when you’re someone’s own personal Jesus that it’s not everything going on in your life. You need to have at least accomplished something great where you can always lie in bed at night and tell yourself “Well, at least I did that.”
Have you seen the show The United States of Tara? The main character has a form of multiple personality disorder. Her husband puts up with all of her “alters” as they call them. Sometimes he gets frustrated, but for the most part he’s always there for Tara. Or maybe not. As I write this I’m only half way through the series. He makes it work though because he has so many other things to do. He’s fixing up houses all the time, he enjoys sports, Patton Oswalt is his best friend, and he seems to drink a beer all the time. He can manage all of the craziness in their family because he has something else. He has things to fall back on and all he ever has to do is remind himself that he started his own landscaping business or whatever it is he does. He can save his wife because although she means everything to him, she is not everything to him.
(He also has a gay son, a daughter who dresses up like a viking princess, and a Puerto Rican who for some reason snorts coke with high school kids)
So what am I really saying? I guess it’s “don’t put all of your eggs into one basket” which to me feels like I not only wasted my time writing this but yours as well making you read this. I suppose this was one of those posts where I’m just trying to figure my own life out and I leave as confused as when I came in.
Do you have fantasies about rescuing people from dangers? Have you done it? Do you have your shit together?