I have very little to say in this post which means this will go 300 more words than planned. All I want to say is that I recently discovered someone was using a picture of me as their Facebook profile picture. At first glance, this is a sweet gesture to let me know how important I am to them. Well, let me clue you in on some facts.

birthday dogs


The above picture is the one they use as their profile picture. Granted, it’s a great picture. It’s still not even my profile picture on Facebook though and never has been yet it is hers.

Who is this woman?

The woman is someone whose dogs occasionally come to the place where I work. They’re not allowed to do much because one of them bites dogs. I met the woman once in person. She was with her husband who made a joke about how his dog is Jewish and it wasn’t a joke, more of a statement. I later thought of a funny response. I should have said “Yeah I can tell. He’s still got his foreskin” because the idea of circumcising a dog is humorous. I didn’t say that though. Instead I laughed and got a stern reaction back, and when I say stern I don’t mean that to be a reference to the popular Jewish last name Stern.

So I met this woman only once ever. Why am I still in her profile picture? Her dogs must be in the picture! Nope. As I said, they aren’t allowed near other dogs because they are troublemakers. So nobody she actually really has a relationship is in this picture.

Perhaps she just likes the picture. I stalked her profile and a couple of her Facebook friends, including a few younger ladies ::raises eyebrows:: liked the picture. Do they think I am related to her? Do they wonder who the fuck I am? I’m bothered by this, yet flattered in a strange way. A very strange way. A way where I’m blushing yet always looking over my shoulder wondering when I will end up tied to a bed like in Misery or whatever happens in the movie. I’m not sure. Kathy Bates frightens me.

There’s nothing I can do about this. For now I am in a picture representing a 50+ year old Jewish woman and it’s a bit of an identity crisis.

  1. Yo, just hangin’ with ma dawgs!

  2. rae333 says:

    this actually made me laugh out loud

  3. rossmurray1 says:

    Well, this is shocking, just shocking; you should never EVER take a photo with a bright window in the background!

  4. You’re a Jewish lady’s fantasy boy toy. :3

  5. Lily says:

    This is a great picture. So many dogs. It’s like my dream. Except you’re there instead of me. I love the big dog sitting on the table.

  6. samokan says:

    LOL.the dogs are looking good though so it can’t be that bad.

  7. 1jaded1 says:

    This was hilarious and a bit disturbing.

  8. perahucadik says:

    Basicly i am a Pet Lover! 🙂

  9. Addie says:

    You look adorable.

    And I am outraged for you.

  10. Lauri says:

    All I can say is “Weird”. Weird weird weird. See?

  11. Pen says:

    Soon you will be a meme too. It is the way of things. Especially if it involves a pile of dogs.

  12. SingingTuna says:

    “Which of these things is not like the others?” keeps running through my mind when I look at this ADORABLE and intriguing picture. I skimmed your post late yesterday and was at first really pi**ed that someone stole your picture. Copyright infringement is everywhere. I’ve got at least 7 pix that people are using as FB avatars. I stopped counting at 7; who knows how may others? It’s not like I was earning money with those particular pix but it’s creepy that someone else is hiding behind/using my work. One of the people is a porn-y kind of guy with a porn-y kind of page, and my work is representing him/it. Ugh.

    But I just re-read this and WOW! You know the lady in person! And she just STOLE it! She knows you! That’s a whole ‘nother level of creepy. It’s not so much about copyright as about “ewwww.”

    Well, maybe she’s one of your fans. Maybe she’s the scout for the Tim Boyleer’s, a rampaging throng of 50+ ladies who’re smitten by you. The dogs are just props…stand-ins for the ladies. In her mind, maybe she’s imaging another picture, one in which she and her cohorts are draped around you, a harem…instead of the dogs.

    Forget “Misery.” This movie hasn’t been made yet (unless Kathy Bates was a closet zombie).


    • Lauri says:

      Is there any butt-sniffing in this movie? If so, this over 50 woman will pass, thanks.

      I do love the picture, though.

      • SingingTuna says:

        Gosh, Lauri, I don’t know. Do zombies do that? If they do, then poor Tim! I counted more than 20 dogs in that picture. If each one was a 50+ year old zombie lady instead, and Tim was the object of their combined affection, he’d be getting sniffed a LOT. Well, that’s the price of fame, I guess.

        Hey! I need to come over and see you. Did Dolly the Llama move in with somoene? I’m a few days behind here. LOL..big surprise.


      • Mooselicker says:

        I’d have to say, there’s lots of butt sniffing. And humping. Dogs are really into that humping thing.

    • Mooselicker says:

      I know her enough where I’m not sure she puts together that I am the one who calls her with disappointing news every 2 months. We’re not friendly or anything. It’s also uncomfortable because there are PLENTY of pictures we post on the company’s Facebook page of other people or even just dogs all lined up like this. Why did she have to pick mine? What do her children think?

  13. SingingTuna says:

    Carp! Typo: Imagining, not imaging.

    • Lauri says:

      Oh sorry I missed the part about zombies. I’m not one yet. Could be any day now.

      Dolly the llama got captured and found a home with three other llamas. She’s a very happy girl.

      • SingingTuna says:

        Awwww!! Dolly’s part of a family now? Nice. But it’s too bad she couldn’t stay with you.

        LOL! Zombies! I don’t think I’ve ever even seen an entire zombie movie. But they turn up everywhere so they seemed like a good bet for a movie treatment. Hmmm…maybe getting older makes people immune to zombieism? I don’t think I’ve ever seen a wrinkly one. I’m safe! I’ve got a couple that look like gorges in the Grand Canyon.


  14. joehoover says:

    That’s just too weird.

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